Today’s quote comes from one of my favorite books and is the last line of the novel. I read this book over again every few years. I realized on accident the older I get the more sense the story becomes.
I first read “Gatsby” my junior year in high school. This line was a game changer that summed up my painful childhood. So I thought.
Oh my God…. I was living in a life that was pushing against me. My parents divorce, moving away from my hometown, from my father… what a cruel life.
What a crock of shit, I had a damn good childhood.
Years later sitting on the end table next to my father’s filthy ashtray was a copy of “Gatsby.”
“Dad, you’re reading Fitzgerald?”
“Son, I’ve read this book a dozen times in my life. Every time I read it the story matures with who I am.”
So we beat on…. we continue to grow older in life, not old. The metaphor of a boat pushing against the current captures how life can be.
(And the use of alliteration is flawless F. Scott)
Life pushes against us, it slows our ability to live effortlessly. Rarely is the water smooth and calm and when it is… catch your breath.
Can you picture me and Don Shepley sitting on the back porch? He probably has Dick Buckley’s jazz program on WBEZ or “Those were the Days” on WNIB playing on his transistor radio. A cold bottle of Liebfraumilch sitting between us. It was the one time we sat down and talked about a book.
I walked away from that Saturday afternoon with the mindset to continue to evaluate or reevaluate life as often as possible.
The present will always push against us, but like a novel, things change the older we get. We look at everything with a wiser pair of eyes.....
When I was seventeen reading “Gatsby” I didn’t have much of a past. My head was up my ass most of those years of childhood.
When I read “Gatsby” today I have more of a sense of how to row the boat calmly into the current of life.
I’m not getting old by living in the past, I’m getting older by learning from the past.
On Father’s Day I want to thank my father for all of the gifts he gave me. More importantly, the gift to move on and not dwell. To square your shoulders and push through to the next day.
Let me dummy it down….
When I watched “Gilligan’s Island” in 1974 I had the hots for Mary Ann. In 1984 when I was old enough to vote I wanted Ginger. Today I have the hots for Mrs. Howell.
The older we get our perspective changes.
Happy Father’s Day Shep… I love you more and more the older I get.
