In the movie “Big Fish” the main character looks into a witch’s eye and learns the details of his death. For the rest of his life he knows how and when he will die. This gift or curse allows him to take chances, be a daredevil and risk his life. Because he knows exactly what will kill him. In the end it was old age.
For years I’ve used this script with the Shepkids. There was an old witch that lived down the Monon tracks and one night we went to visit her. We got to her front porch and I knocked at the door. When the witch answered I asked her if I could look in her eye. She let me do it only if I came back tomorrow and mowed her lawn.
I looked in her eye and saw how I died. It’s on Thanksgiving and I’m an old man. I’m sitting in a recliner watching the Bears play the Lions. My grandchildren are all fucking around. Fritz is telling stupid jokes. George is talking about the history of computers and Hazel is fixing the afghan my gramma made me seventy five years ago. My grandson John Shepley grabs me an Old Style out of the icebox. I finish drinking it, put the recliner way back and close my eyes for my Thanksgiving nap.
Next thing I know I’m sitting in a nightclub with my parents watching Louis Armstrong and Billie Holiday.
Wouldn’t it be great to know when and where you are leaving life and heading to heaven?
That reminds me that I better remove the Penthouse from under my mattress. I don’t want the kids finding it if I die over the weekend.
