Living on the third floor of a three flat gives me good reception for my digital antenna. ”Wheel of Fortune” was on channel 7-1 at six thirty last night. When it was finished, I started surfing the digital channels before switching to streaming.
I didn’t get any further than 7-3, THIS-TV. At seven o’clock they were showing “The Longest Yard” from 1974. Right away the station said that this movie will be formatted for viewing on television. That meant the swearing will be cut out and commercials cut in. I don’t care, I’m just going to watch Burt Reynolds in the chase scene at the beginning of the movie then I’ll change to Monday Night Football.
Burt Reynolds was my man in the 1970’s. You give me Burt and Steve Austin, the Six Million Dollar man, throw in Jim Rockford and we are talking bad ass dudes from my childhood.
I ended up watching the whole damn movie. I’m also a sucker for Bernadette Peters. When I first saw this movie with my dad on the WGN Friday night movie forty five years ago, I fell in love with Ms. Peters.
She gave me at the time what I called a beanstalk in my pants. So did Cat Woman on “Batman” and the girl with Charlton Heston on the planet with the apes.
Back to Burt Reynolds…..
This movie has football, Ray Nitschke, Burt Reynolds at his best and Bernadette Peters. I watched it until the end, commercials and all.
The commercials on this grainy digital station are all aimed towards the elderly. AARP commercials, reverse mortgages commercials and home delivery of adult diaper commercials.
I started thinking about the severity of old age and if I will need to wear a fucking diaper in the 2050’s. 1993 doesn’t seem so long ago, which means 2053 is just down the yellow brick road.
I imagined Hazel opening the door to her home and picking up the big box left on the porch. A discreet box that won’t tell her neighbors that her Oldman pisses himself. A box delivered the next day with free shipping.
I endured the piss pad commercials. I endured Henry Winkler and Magnum PI hawking scams to desperate old people. I even put up with the pharmaceutical commercials.
And I will admit that there is a hot lady on one of the AARP commercials. She’s probably wearing a diaper, but she was put together well for her age.
I watched THIS-TV and the Monday night movie all the way through until the end. I even watched the credits. The film studio thanked the Georgia Film Department and Georgia Governor Jimmy Carter for allowing them to film. I never knew that…
For a horrible president, Jimmy Carter turned out to be the best ex president in our generation.
That’s how I spent my Monday night. I watched one of the top five sports movies on a goofy digital station. I’m thinking if “Slapshot” is the Tuesday night movie, I’ll be watching senior citizen commercials for a second night in a row.
I hope your pow wow is going well this week as we enjoy this Indian Summer.
Enjoy your Two for Tuesday all you gorgeous Chalkheads.
Tomorrow we can talk more about Beanstalks and my dad’s explanation to my mom what a beanstalk is….. ewww gross!
